Painted Grace

He canceled the record of the  charges against us

and took it away by nailing it to the cross. 

In this way he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities

He shamed them publicly by his victory over them at the cross.

Colossians 2:14-15 NLT

As I opened Beth's study on legalism, my heart sank. Rules, perfectionism, lack of mercy.
I see my own reflection in the Pharisee. 

The old me, the me who raised her children by mixtures and measures of grace and rules.

Measuring sticks handed out at church combined  with filters lodged in my soul by my own harsh childhood created a lethal combination.

I spent untold hours over the last few years in repentance and remorse until all good of the past is shrouded in shame. 

Sometimes all that is left is to forgive oneself and move on to victory ground. The ground of the cross where the record of our failures was expunged.

I am choosing the solid ground covered in Blood but my heart aches for the mixed message I gave my children concerning God. The God of Love and mercy.

Then I'm reminded of a promise given long ago.

Lord, you promised to paint grace over the canvas of my family's lives. I take you at your Word.

Your faithful love endures forever. 

I forgive me and release myself from blame - solely because of who you are and whose I am.

I believe your grace is huge! 

Paint big, Lord! 

Huge beautiful strokes of grace

reveal the true God of love.

I once prayed a prayer that I would be soaked in grace until I ooze grace.

I want to ooze the colors of grace.

Show us your glory,  O Redeemer and Restorer in this advent season.